Valentine’s Day sprinkles in all kinds of feels from all those butterflies to even the depths of depression. Love is complex as it is, is said to feel different to different people … some believe each of us have a language of love. In fact, there is even a book on how to identify your partner’s love language and show up for them that way … but what about showing up for yourself! What’s your love language? Do you even know? Maybe a better question is what gets to you the most?

Sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you … we beg to differ! For those of us who put high value on words – they can sting and even roll us up in anxiety or depression. For many, the root of their addiction stems from emotional abuse, mental health issues, and trauma. Yup, those good old words, especially from someone we care deeply about, can cause wounds; and for many the fastest alleviation from the pain is to drink it all away or have substance abuse issues spiral. So if you like many are sitting here pondering if words mean a lot to you, they probably do. Whether you are sober or not, we challenge you to change the script you have running in your head. Yea … it starts with you! Start speaking positively to yourself, start expecting that same positive self-talk to reflect outward, and don’t put up with words that don’t feel right by you or others!

Acts of service is another way to show a loved one you care, another language of love. For many stuck in addiction, they’ve been stuck in people pleasing positions and lack self esteem. They say “yes” when they want to or even should say NO! This eventually can erode one’s senses of self. Codependency is often a core component of addiction and abusive relationships. The cycle of abuse goes hand in hand with addiction only making it worse. Acts of service are your next challenge but this time it’s acts of service for yourself … getting our theme here 😉 An act of service for yourself can be as simple as getting a good nights rest, having some soothing tea or even getting your exercise in. All of these items big or small can be acts of service for yourself.

Lastly, quality time is said to be one of the languages of love. For partners, some value quality time more than anything. For those that do, it means being present and enjoying each other’s company … think tech unplug here. When it comes to quality time for yourself … unplugging and taking a deep dive within can help you feel more grounded and sure of yourself. Journaling your happy times, fears, struggles, things you are looking forward to etc can all help you land feelings. Quality time with yourself helps you get to know you! It’s a hard feat with a world that is in constant movement but it can be done. If you’ve been considering for example getting sober or want to continue your dry January, why not get to know your core values. What do you value, why do you value it, and what in your life does or does not reflect those values?

All in all, we want you to love yourself and doing so is a key component to sobriety. The road to recovery is just that, a road. It takes time, support, and a community that can celebrate your wins with you and get you through the darkness. Our team at Scottsdale Recovery and Detox Center will lead the way to a brighter future and help you get back to a place of self-love. If you or a loved one are seeking support we are a phone call away. Learn more by visiting or call 1-888-NODRUGS.

Talk to Someone Who’s Been There. Talk to Someone Who Can Help. Scottsdale Recovery Center holds the highest accreditation (Joint Commission) and is Arizona’s premier rehab facility since 2009. Call 602-346-9142.